"Welcome Home"

The boarder agent at MSP airport, friends at church, family, and the extremely friendly cashier at Target. This is just a short list of people that said the title of this post to me, "welcome home".

A few weeks ago, we traveled back to the US to celebrate my brother's wedding to his wonderful bride. It was a really great trip filled with meeting new friends, short visits with old ones, and some sweet family time. After two and a half years away, I did not know what to expect coming back to the US. The phrase that caught me the most was "welcome home."

Often my answer in the moment was simply "thank you," but inside I was feeling conflicted. There is a real sense in which Minnesota is "home" to me. I know the streets there better than probably any place and some of my favorite places are in that state. Despite all this, I have not lived in Minnesota for an extended period of time since before I married Bethany. So much in my life is different now, and so many things have changed. 

There are other places that could vie for "home" status. We lived in Chicago both before and right after we got married. This place is very important to me, with great friends and a wonderful church.

I can try to apply pithy phrases as "home is where the heart is" or "home is where my rump rests", but I think living in a foreign culture has changed my definition of home. My apartment here in Austria has become my home. After two weeks of being away from Vienna, it felt great to hear and speak my adopted language again. We have built a life here, and it feels like this is home. But the reality is, I will never speak German as well as Ellie will, and I will never completely understand all the cultural subtleties around me. This place is home, but I will in some ways forever be an outsider.

At this point in life, Vienna is home. We love speaking German, and we love living here. We have relationships here, and we know enough about the culture to navigate some of the obvious pot holes that Americans generally fall into. This doesn't mean that we don't feel a connection to the States or to other places, but we are so blessed to be settled and feel integrated in our host culture.

Home is a tricky concept for those that straddle cultures. In some ways, it feels like no matter where we go, a piece of our heart will be elsewhere. For me, this is because I have given my heart away, and I think that is exceedingly important.

Packed Up, Shipped Out

Yesterday, we spent the day at our friends' Tim and Rebecca's house. Why? Because they were generously storing our household belongings for the last15 months! Thank you, Tim and Rebecca! And yesterday, we were finally able to move out of their basement and take our belongings off their hands.

We hired a shipping company to come pick up all of our belongings and prepare them to be shipped to Austria. And let me tell you, this was quite the process! They had to open each box to verify it's contents, create a log of what was in each item (there were 102 items/boxes in all), record the serial numbers of all electronics, and then pack them like puzzle pieces into these two lift vans (large wooden crates).

When we had it all brought out to the garage and we looked at the crates, we were all worried that it wouldn't fit. There was no way! But sure enough, our belongings actually fit in the two lift vans with room to spare. We had originally budgeted for the 2 crates PLUS an extra smaller container...and we didn't need the third container! This saved us money, which was very good news.

It was exciting to pack it all up and watch it drive away. It's just one more step that makes moving to Austria very real. We haven't been able to access or use our household items for over a year now and seeing it all packed into the crates makes me excited for the day when the container arrives and we get to make a home for ourselves again. It will be like Christmas! Although this is still 6 - 8 months away, the day is coming! (Our belongings will be stored in the States until we receive our longterm visa and sign a long term lease on an apartment. Then they will be shipped to us in Austria, probably in May 2013.)

Just a few more days until we are also 'packed up and shipped out'. We're ready for the adventure to begin!

Our Temporary Home

Our dining area in the kitchen

We are excited to post that we have found an apartment in Vienna! We spent a few weeks scouring websites with apartment listings and then got feedback from team members on neighborhoods, location and apartment features. We are excited about our choice and eager to move in a few weeks from now!

The kitchen - so excited to cook here and entertain guests!

This apartment will be our "temporary home" for the next 3 months, from October 7 - January 5. We are excited to move into a fully furnished place for our first stay in Vienna, since we can focus on getting settled in the culture without worrying about buying all of the items we'll need for a home. We can focus on getting cell phones, exploring the city, learning to shop and finding a language school. (We are only renting it for 3 months because we have to leave the country for 90 days in early January due to via reasons.)

Bedroom and wardrobe

We have been without an apartment for over a year now, and it's definitely weighing on us. It's hard to live out of a suitcase for so long and to feel "scattered" all the time. I keep losing things because I forget where I put them! And we are so excited to cook our own food together again. Cooking is a really fun and special hobby for us that we love to do together, so we've really missed it this last year.

Living room

Thinking about this "temporary home" in Vienna made me think of our "temporary home" while we're here on earth. Like our new apartment, we know as Christians that this is not our permanent residence here on earth, but that God can use us here and do great things before we move on to eternity. Even though it's not the end goal, we can be blessed here and see purpose in being here. But ultimately, our hearts long for the permanence of our long-term home where we can be at peace.

Where are you from?

Photo credit: clarita from morguefile.com

It's getting harder to respond. How should I answer? Do they really want to know the complexities of our life right now...or are they just being polite? Should I just say Chicago or Connecticut because it's easier? Or should I delve into our whole, long story and our nomadic lifestyle?

Nowadays, when I meet someone new and they ask me, "Where are you from?", I pause. And the monologue above runs through my head. As time goes on and we become more and more nomadic, I recognize that this common, polite question is becoming more difficult to answer. Sometimes, I feel like I'm still from Chicago, because I spent the last 10 years living there and that is the only place where Nate and I have had a home together. But then after moving back to Connecticut for the last 5 months, I've reconnected with my feelings of home in New England. I would love to say that Vienna is home, but of course, that won't be a reality for quite some time.

In reality, none of these places can be called "home", at least in the traditional sense of the word. Until we settle and make a home for ourselves, we will continue to live in limbo. This can be a difficult "land between" to experience, but there are also great blessings. For one, when someone asks me that question, it immediately opens the door for me to share with them about the step Nate and I are taking. And God has used that conversation in many exciting ways, from opportunities to share the gospel to opportunities to connect with fellow believers about missions. Secondly, being without a home helps me identify with others who share this experience. There are many refugees living in this country and in Vienna that have been displaced, are in transition, and don't have a home. For the first time, I know what that feels like, at least in some small way. And many MKs (missionary kids) I know feel the same way, being torn between the country they grew up in and the country of their ethnic origin. These questions are hard to answer for them, too.

I may not know where I'm from anymore, but I do know where I am going. I will continue to live in the "land between", eagerly anticipating the day when we will have a home and thanking God for all of the temporary homes He is providing along the way!

Note: This post was inspired by Sheryl O'Bryan and her post here.