Thoughts from the BEG Forum

Last weekend, I (Nate) went to a conference in the mountains called the BEG Forum. Besides being in an incredibly beautiful setting, I heard from two really great speakers. They shared their hearts for the church to work along with parents to disciple children. The topic is near and dear to our hearts as we think about raising little Ellie in the knowledge and love of God.

Here are some photos from the weekend followed by some short thoughts that I gleaned from the weekend.

The conference center in the Alps

We learned to "think Orange" - church (yellow) and family (red) together

Some really great thoughts from a psychologist about talking with children

I was able to play with the worship band and get some great experience leading music in German

So in no particular order, here are some thoughts that were valuable to me coming out of the weekend.

1. The goal of parenting is not well-behaved children. Our goal as parents is to lead children to the true and living God and teach them to follow him. This idea is profound to me. I think there is a strong pragmatic force in parenting. It moves us towards what works in the moment instead of what is best for the child or what moves us towards our ultimate goal. Guiding children towards holiness and godliness involves bringing them into our relationship with God and allowing them to share in that. Jesus modeled this idea. He was far more concerned with the hearts of his hearers than their outward ability to keep the law.

2. Our culture (it was addressed to Austrian culture, but it fits with American culture, as well) has a very distorted view of what love actually is. It is highly romanticized (does every kiss really begin with a jewelry store?). The question that was really stark for me was "What kind of romantic feelings did Jesus have for us, when he was on the cross?" This thought is huge for me in exploring the "other side" of love. The speaker said that this is in direct contrast to an Old Testament view of love that is forever tied to actions and not just feelings. (I understand that this could be its own post or a series thereof.)

I think this idea resonated so much for me coming out of the last few months with Ellie. Even though there is a lot of "romanticizing" that surrounds having children, no one has deeply romantic feelings about holding a screaming baby. But, there is still so much love in that moment.

These are just some of the thoughts I had coming out of this weekend. Feel free to share your experiences if you were there. Or share your reactions to what I have shared.

Speaking Like a Child

Last Friday marked the end of our first level of German classes. Here they call it the A1 level (here is an explanation of the language levels we plan to go through). We were really happy to hit this milestone. It is amazing how much you absorb in the beginning. It feels like you learn so much each day. Every night we go to bed very tired.  

I am sure I sound like my nephew. The last time we visited, he was learning how to use the phrase "of course." He said that phrase every few moments as he learned when how it fit into normal speech. From directly translated English expressions to odd word combinations, I am walking a child-like path of language learning.

We talked a lot in our training about a loss of competency. It is not as though I am mentally back on the same plane as a little child, but in terms of words, expressions, and nuances of meaning, I am on the level of a first or second grader.

I have felt this most acutely in our language classes. It is our teacher's job to take us into new territory. I feel often that we wander back and forth across the imaginary line of my personal competency in German. This "fish out of water" experience is a source of stress for living here. Even when I was in college, I rarely felt as though I needed to intensely concentrate on the class to track along with the professor. Some of this is my slightly ADD personality, but also we rarely covered ideas that we hadn't read about the night before. Even when the ideas were new, there was a familiar framework to work through and a common language in which things could be explained. It is an interesting paradox; our brains are designed to absorb language, but it also is such an emotionally resource-intensive experience.

It is a humbling feeling to be on the end of competency. Our whole class is feeling it in one way or another. We have many professionals and educated people in our class, and we are talking about the simplest things and forming the simplest sentences imaginable. It is a huge test of humility and one I hope I am able to meet head on. It gives me so much respect for the foreigners I have encountered in my own country and those that have earned degrees in a second language.

Question: When have you felt a loss of competency in your life? Birth of a child? New job? Moving to a new area?

Photo credit farmer64 from morguefile.com

A Legacy of Faith

Gathering for a meal and singing the doxology at the Grand Beach Inn

This past weekend, my Dad's side of the family (the Veermans) all met up in New Buffalo, MI for a weekend family reunion. It was a sweet and special time, where my immediate family plus nearly all of my aunts and uncles, cousins, and cousins' children got together for fun, food and fellowship. The group of 40 laughed, played silly games, cooked, ate, caught up, sang and shared together for four days. It was wonderful!

Family is really special to us, and what amazes me every time we get together is that even though we don't see each other often, we can immediately share intimate life details and openly share our hearts. There is a closeness that comes from shared history, shared family roots, and especially our shared faith.

One special time of the weekend for me was on Sunday morning, when my Uncle Ralph gave a devotional on the importance of passing down faith from generation to generation. My dad and his siblings shared about the faith of my grandparents and the values they instilled in their family, which were then passed down to the next generation. I am who I am today in part because of their faith, love of God, commitment to church and missions, and family values. Their legacy shaped my dad, which in turn shaped how I was raised and who I have become. 

In scripture, God calls us to teach our children and our children's children the ways of God and to remember what the Lord has done. Deuteronomy 4:9 - 10 says, "Only be careful, and watch yourselves closely so that you do not forget the things your eyes have seen or let them fade from your heart as long as you live. Teach them to your children and to their children after them."

I am so thankful that my grandparents responded to God's instruction and passed on their faith, and I pray that Nate and I will do the same so our family legacy of faith can continue.

How has your family passed faith down to you?
How do you hope to pass your faith along to the next generation?

Best Use of A Prayer Magnet

Yesterday at the park we saw a great use for our prayer magnets.  Who knew they tasted good?